| Dear Doctor Love I need some advice. I had been secretly in love with someone, B., for the past 2 years. He and I are good friends, but he likes someone else, Kara, who is also my friend. So since it didn't seem possible for me to express my feelings for him, I helped him court Kara. Then Kara decided that she wasn't ready to commit, and broke up with him. He was so devastated that I didn't know what to do. He wanted me to help them come back together, so during our Christmas party, I got them to dance together. But somehow, I felt so sad I had to stop dancing and go somewhere to cry. Then when he came back and told me that Kara had rejected him again, I just didn't know if I should feel glad or sad, or anything at all. When I was about to leave the dance, he offered to send me off. We ended up discussing he and Kara. When he told me that he is willing to wait until Kara accepts him, I felt my heart die. I was so sad that i just wanted to end my feelings for him. So I asked him to close his eyes, kissed him and said goodbye. Since I didn't think we'd meet again, I thought everything would end there. But I cannot get my mind off him. Then I met Kara yesterday at a party. We left together and talked about their relationship. She told me that she's hesitant about the outcome and thus is not confident enough to make up with B. So I ended up encouraging her to accept B. Then I felt so rotten about myself that I went home to cry again. I'm hopeless and I don't think I can take it anymore. I don't think I can continue being their go-between aunt-agony anymore, but I can't tell Kara that I love her boyfriend. What should I do? In need of a break, Gone-Between My God! How much suffering can you inflict on yourself. Stay out of their relationship! Tell B. that he is too good to be with someone who doesn't love him and tell Kara that you don't want to be a go between. Also, don't tell either of them about your secret passion. He won't be ready for you unless he gets over her so tell him he is worth much more than this kind of suffering. Then give it some time. Meanwhile, act friendly to both. IF he comes to you, tell him that you care, but that he needs to work it out for himself. Tell him you know someone who likes him, but that you can't tell him till he gets over this. Then see what happens. Besides, this is a self-esteem issue for you. Don't you think you deserve someone for yourself? The only way to find out if there can really be anything between you and B. is to let him heal, and then see if he responds to you. Also, I wouldn't spend that much time with either of them right now. Hang out with others. You may actually meet someone else that you like even better. Waiting around won't get you anywhere and may actually be an unconscious statement that you don't think you can get your own guy. Believe me, you can.! Let me know how it goes. Good luck.. |
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
"I'm the Go-Between Who Loves the Guy"
15 Tips to Increase Blog Traffic
The blogosphere is a big and busy world with over 100 million blogs and growing. How do you attract visitors to your blog? Follow these simple tips to drive traffic to your blog.
1. Write Well and Write Often
Frequently updating your blog with useful content is the first step to building your blog's audience. The content you write is what will keep readers coming back for more. Make sure you have something meaningful to say to them and say it often to maintain their interest and keep them loyal.
Furthermore, post frequently to increase the number of chances you have for your blog's content to be noticed by search engines such as Google or Technorati.
2. Submit Your Blog to Search Engines
Get on the radar screen for the popular search engines such as Google and Yahoo! by submitting your blog's URL to them. Most search engines provide a 'Submit' link (or something similar) to notify the search engine of your new blog, so those search engines will crawl it and include your pages in their results.
It's important to understand that simply submitting your blog to search engines doesn't mean your pages will appear at the top of a Google search results screen, but at least your blog will be included and will have the chance of being picked up by a search engine.
3. Use and Update Your Blogroll
By adding links to sites you like in your blogroll, the owners of those blogs will find your blog and will be likely to add a reciprocal link in their blogrolls. It's an easy way to get the link to your blog in front of many readers on other blogs. The hope is that some of those readers will click on the link to your blog on the other blogs' blogrolls and find your content interesting and enjoyable turning them into loyal readers.
4. Harness the Power of Comments
Commenting is a simple and essential tool to increase your blog's traffic. First, respond to comments left on your blog to show your readers that you value their opinions and draw them into a two-way conversation. This will increase reader loyalty.
Second, leave comments on other blogs to drive new traffic. Make sure you leave your blog's URL in your comment, so you create a link back to your own blog. Many people will read the comments left on a blog post. If they read a particularly interesting comment, they are highly likely to click on the link to visit the commentor's website. It's important to make sure you leave meaningful comments that are likely to invite people to click on your link to read more.
5. Syndicate Your Blog's Content with an RSS Feed
Setting up an RSS feed button on your blog makes it easy for your loyal readers to not just read your blog but also know when you publish new content.
6. Use Links and Trackbacks
Links are one of the most powerful parts of your blog. Not only are links noticed by search engines, but they also act as a tap on the shoulder to other bloggers who can easily identify who is linking to their sites. Linking helps to get you noticed by other bloggers who are likely to investigate the sites that are linking to them. This may lead them to become new readers of your blog or to add links to your blog from theirs.
You can take links to other blogs a step further by leaving a trackback on the other blog to let them know you've linked to them. Blogs that allow trackbacks will include a link back to your blog in the comments section of the post that you originally linked to. People do click on trackback links!
7. Tag Your Posts
It takes a few extra seconds to add tags to each of your blog posts, but it's worth the time in terms of the additional traffic tags can drive to your blog. Tags (like links) are easily noticed by search engines. They're also key to helping readers find your blog when they perform searches on popular blog search engines such as Technorati.
8. Submit Your Posts to Social Bookmarking Sites
Taking the time to submit your best posts to social bookmarking sites such as Digg, StumbleUpon, Reddit and more can be a simple way to quickly boost traffic to your blog.
9. Remember Search Engine Optimization
When you write your blog posts and pages, remember to optimize your pages for search engines to find them. Include relevant keywords and links but don't overload your posts with too many relevant keywords or completely irrelevant keywords. Doing so can be considered spamming and could have negative results such as your blog being removed from Google's search entirely.
10. Don't Forget Images
Images don't just make your blog look pretty, they also help people find you in search engine listings. People often use the image search options offered by Google, Yahoo! and other search engines, and naming your images with search engine optimization in mind can easily boost your traffic.The blogosphere is a big and busy world with over 100 million blogs and growing. How do you attract visitors to your blog? Follow these simple tips to drive traffic to your blog.
11. Consider Guest Blogging
Guest blogging can be done when you write a guest post on another blogger's blog or when another blogger writes a guest post on your blog. Both methods are likely to increase traffic as your blog will be exposed to the other blogger's audience. Many of the other blogger's readers will visit your blog to see what you have to say.
12. Join Forums, Web Rings or Online Groups
Find online forums, web rings, groups or social networking sites such as Facebook and LinkedIn where you can share ideas and ask questions of like-minded individuals. Add a link to your blog in your signature line or profile, so each time you post on a forum or participate in another online network, you're indirectly promoting your blog. Chances are many people will click on that link to learn more about you.
13. Promote Outside Your Blog
Promoting your blog shouldn't stop when you step outside the blogosphere. Add your blog's URL to your email signature and business cards. Talk about it in offline conversations. It's important to get your name and your blog's URL noticed offline, too.
14. Nominate Yourself and Other Blogs for Blog Awards
There are a number of blog awards given out throughout the year. Nominating yourself and other blogs and bloggers can draw attention to your blog and drive traffic to it.
15. Don't Be Shy
The most important part of the blogosphere is its community and much of your success as a blogger will be tied to your willingness to network with that community. Don't be afraid to ask questions, join conversations or just say hi and introduce yourself. Don't sit back and hope the online world will find you. Speak out and get yourself noticed. Let the blogosphere know you've arrived and have something to say!
Creating a three column (or a wide, two column) canvas - Blogger template design series====Credits to bloggerbuster
When I begin to design a new Blogger template, the first thing I take into consideration is the overall layout. Creating the perfect layout is crucial to the design process, and should be the first step in designing a custom Blogger template.
The most popular layout styles for Blogger blogs are:
- Three columns, with sidebars to the left and right
- Three columns with two sidebars to the right
- A wide two column template, with a wider posts area and a wide sidebar to the right
So in this installment of the Blogger Template Design series, I will offer basic instructions for how each of these layouts can be constructed. Then in the next installment, I will focus on tweaking these layouts in order to make the canvas complete.
For the purpose of this series, I have created a demonstration blog which you can view here. This demonstration blog will be used to demonstrate customizations throughout the series, and will include links back to each chapter of the series for your reference.
Things you should consider when deciding on your blog layout
Visual appeal is not the only thing you should consider when deciding which layout you will adopt for your template. The three different styles I highlighted above can all serve different functional purposes; depending on you wish to display in your sidebars, one or other may be better suited to your needs:
- Three column templates with sidebars to the left and right are best suited to blogs which don't use many Javascripts or images in the sidebars.
This is because Javascripts and images call upon different servers and slow down page loading time. If you have many scripts or images loading in the left sidebar, this can delay the loading of your posts, which is off-putting for new visitors to your blog (especially those who access the Internet through dial-up!) - Three column templates with both sidebars aligned to the right are a good choice for blogs which feature a lot of different content in the sidebars.
This style helps neaten the content of sidebars, prevents lengthy loading delays of the blog entries (the primary content) and stops the sidebars from becoming too long in relation the main content on post pages. - Two column templates with a wide posts section and wide sidebar are most suitable for those who feature ads in the sidebar, or who need much content to be "above the fold" of the page.
Wider sidebars allow for wider ads, or rows of the popular 125x125 square ad boxes which can feature higher up the page. Also, it is easier to display wider images, or text blocks. A wider posts section will also allow more content to be featured above the fold, and can prevent home pages from becoming too lengthy.
With this in mind, let's take a look at the different methods available for creating a template canvas.
Is to base this on an existing template! Blogger templates contain a vast variety of tags and code, which is very difficult to reconstruct by hand. By basing your customized template on an existing template which already has tags and code in place, you will make the job much easier for yourself, and will save hours (if not days) of time troubleshooting a hand coded template. The recent poll I offered concluded that the most familiar template to Blogger Buster readers is the Minima template, so for the purpose of this series, I will base all tutorials on modifications of this template. By the time this series is complete, the resulting "demonstration" template will not resemble Minima at all! I would strongly recommend that you use a test blog to create your customized template rather than interfere with your main blog. For more information about test blogs, take a look at this post, or read through my guide to essential tools for customizing Blogger templates. If you choose not to use a test blog, you must back up your existing template before making any changes to it! From this point forwards, I will assume that you are either using a test blog to create your new template, or that you have fully backed up your existing template. Over the years, the default Blogger templates have not changed much. Aside from the stretch designs (which are designed to accommodate the entire width of the browser window), most are rather narrow when compared to the size of most readers' browser screens. So the first thing we will do to the Minima template is make it wider. The resulting width will then be large enough to include either two sidebars (instead of only one), or alternatively a wider posts column and a thicker sidebar. Most modern blog templates, whether hosted on Blogger, Wordpress or Typepad platforms, are between 800 and 950 pixels wide. This seems to be the optimum size range for blog templates, as this width can accommodate two sidebars or an expanded entries column. I would recommend that you make your template no wider than 950 pixels. Even though this width may not fully span the width of your own browser window, you can be fairly certain that it will not run off the screen of smaller browsers. In these tutorials, I will show you how to create a blog layout which is 950 pixels wide, though you can certainly make this a different value if you prefer. The overall width of the Minima template is determined by the "outer-wrapper" div. This is styled within the To change the width of the template to 950 pixels, we simply need to change the line highlighted in red to this: As you can see, there is now a wide gap between the posts column and the sidebar. We can fill this gap by using one of these methods: Depending on your choice of blog layout, you will need to use one of the following methods for your custom template. Although I have previously written a post about this method, I have decided to revamp my method here to add some extra functionality to the finished template. In this tutorial, we will create the following dimensions in the layout: This ensures regularity of each element, and will make it easier to add margins and passing at a later stage. It is easier to change the width of the existing sidebar before we add another one. To do this, open your template (no need to expand the widget templates) and find this section of code in the Change the line highlighted in red to this: Your sidebar will now be slightly wider. Before we can call the secind sidebar in the blog template, we will need to add the styling for this sidebar, and make it unique. Find and copy this whole section from your template (this is the section we modified in the previous step): This is the identity of the div which contains the sidebar wrappers. Each div element which has an ID must be unique and should only be called once within the page. By adding the "new" part to the title of the style for the div, we can ensure the new sidebar will display properly. If you want your second sidebar to fleat to the right of the main posts column, you can leave the styling as it is. However, if you prefer the sidebar to appear to the left of the main posts column, you will need to change the following line: This will ensure that your new sidebar will float to the left. To call the secind sidebar, we need to add a section of code to the actual template section. The location for this code changes depending on whether you wish the second sidebar to be aligned to the left or the right of the main posts column. There are two possible locations for this second sidebar. Assuming you have not added any extra widgets to your Minima template, you will be able to find the following section of code in your Blogger template (do not expand the widget templates): You should save your new template at this point. There is currently no content in this second sidebar, so if you preview your blog, nothing will be displayed in it's place. But if you go to Template>Page Elements in your Blogger dashboars, you will see a new "Add page element" section. Here you can add a new widget and take a look at your blog to see how it will be displayed. In my demonstration blog, I added the new sidebar to appear to the right of the main column which now appears like this: The final customization to this three column layout is changing the width of the main posts column slighly to make better use of the space available. This is another simple edit. Simply find this section in the The finished result should look something like this: You will notice that there is no space between the sidebars or main posts column. To make space appear between each sections, we will need to use margins and/or padding in the style section, which I will demonstrate in the next chapter of the Blogger Template Design series. Creating a wider template with added space for the main posts column and sidebar is a much simpler process. In this example, we will make the width of the posts column to 650px, and the width of the sidebar to 300px. You can change these values if you prefer, so long as the total of these two sections is 950px. The width of the main posts column is defined in the following section of code: The width of the sidebar id defined in the following section of code: Finally, save your template and take a look at your newly widened blog. If you have used the same values as I did, your new template should appear like this: As with the three column layout, you will notice there is no space between the sidebars and the main posts column. We will work on optimizing this canvas in the next installment of the Blogger Template Design series. For your convenience, I have made each of the template layouts described above available for download as an XML template. To download any of these files, right click on the link and choose "Save As..." For the demonstration blog which will accompany this series, I have chosen the three column design where the two sidebars are aligned to the right. You can view the progress of the Blogger Template Design Series blog using this link. Please consider subscribing to the feed for updates to the Blogger Template Design series, plus Blogger related news and articles as they are posted.The best way to create a customized template...
Before we begin!
Making a wider template
The optimum width of a blog template
Alter the outer-wrapper
#outer-wrapper {
width: 660px;
margin:0 auto;
padding:10px;
text-align:$startSide;
font: $bodyfont;
}width: 950px;
After this change, my demonstration blog now looks like this:
Creating a three column template (with a second sidebar)
Change the width of the sidebar
#sidebar-wrapper {
width: 220px;
float: $endSide;
word-wrap: break-word; /* fix for long text breaking sidebar float in IE */
overflow: hidden; /* fix for long non-text content breaking IE sidebar float */
}width: 250px
Adding the style for the second sidebar
#sidebar-wrapper {
Once you have copied this to your clipboard, paste this section of code immedietly beneath the original set of code. Then change this line in your newly pasted code:
width: 250px;
float: $endSide;
word-wrap: break-word; /* fix for long text breaking sidebar float in IE */
overflow: hidden; /* fix for long non-text content breaking IE sidebar float */
}#sidebar-wrapper {
To say this instead: #new-sidebar-wrapper {
float: $endSide;
To this instead: float: $startSide;
Calling the second sidebar in your blog template
I have included some comments here to show where to paste the following code, depending on your choice of alignment. When you have decided where you would like your second sidebar to appear, copy and paste the following section of code in the appropriate place:
Change the width of the main posts column
#main-wrapper {
Change the line highlighted in red to the following:
width: 410px;
float: $startSide;
word-wrap: break-word; /* fix for long text breaking sidebar float in IE */
overflow: hidden; /* fix for long non-text content breaking IE sidebar float */
}width: 450px;
Then save your template.
Creating a wide, two column template
Change the width of the main posts column
#main-wrapper {
Simply change the line highlighted in red to this:
width: 410px;
float: $startSide;
word-wrap: break-word; /* fix for long text breaking sidebar float in IE */
overflow: hidden; /* fix for long non-text content breaking IE sidebar float */
}width: 650px;
Change the width of the sidebar
#sidebar-wrapper {
Again, you only need to edit the line in red to say the following instead:
width: 220px;
float: $endSide;
word-wrap: break-word; /* fix for long text breaking sidebar float in IE */
overflow: hidden; /* fix for long non-text content breaking IE sidebar float */
}width: 300px;
Final words
Progress of the demonstration blog
Coming soon
In the next installment of this series, I will explain how you can further modify this basic canvas to suit your requirements. This will include modifications to the margins, padding and the header section, plus a few other elements of the blog's style.
Effect of custom domain conversion on traffic and PageRank
As you know, Blogger has introduced custom domain whereby you can register your own domain name and use it for your blog instead of the sub-domain of blogspot.com. Some may be deterred from using custom domain because it involves a change of URL (Uniform Resource Locator) and PageRank of the blog reduced to being not ranked, both which may reduce the traffic to the blog.
Last year I finally decided to make the leap and convert one of my less traffic blog, http://dummies-guide-to-google-blogger.blogspot.com/ to custom domain, namely http://www.blogger-book.com/.
Regarding PageRank, it did get downgraded from a PageRank of 4 to being not ranked at all. However, the PageRank of Blogger book has now increased to PageRank 1 and is expected to increase as time goes by. The best of all is, it appear that PageRank is not that crucial to getting hits (traffic) as the conversion to custom domain, despite the PageRank downgrad, did not decrease. In fact, from an average of 3020 unique visitors per month from the month of January to October (before conversion), the number of unique visitors have increased to 3976, an increase of 32% (see screen shot below):
However, before I convert, I saved all the permalink prior to conversion to custom domain to test whether the old permalink will be redirected to the new custom domain permalink. I am happy to report that all the old permalink is being effortlessly redirected to the new custom domain permalink (individual post URL).
Update: A blogger has complained that after conversion, traffic went down to almost zero. It turned out that the blogger registered the domain direct from Godaddy. In my case, I registered using Google Apps via SETTINGS > PUBLISHING, paid for the registration and did the conversion to custom domain all within Blogger, never directly through Godaddy. Looks like most of those bloggers experiencing problems with custom domain did it via Godaddy.
Last year I finally decided to make the leap and convert one of my less traffic blog, http://dummies-guide-to-google-blogger.blogspot.com/ to custom domain, namely http://www.blogger-book.com/.
Regarding PageRank, it did get downgraded from a PageRank of 4 to being not ranked at all. However, the PageRank of Blogger book has now increased to PageRank 1 and is expected to increase as time goes by. The best of all is, it appear that PageRank is not that crucial to getting hits (traffic) as the conversion to custom domain, despite the PageRank downgrad, did not decrease. In fact, from an average of 3020 unique visitors per month from the month of January to October (before conversion), the number of unique visitors have increased to 3976, an increase of 32% (see screen shot below):
However, before I convert, I saved all the permalink prior to conversion to custom domain to test whether the old permalink will be redirected to the new custom domain permalink. I am happy to report that all the old permalink is being effortlessly redirected to the new custom domain permalink (individual post URL).
Update: A blogger has complained that after conversion, traffic went down to almost zero. It turned out that the blogger registered the domain direct from Godaddy. In my case, I registered using Google Apps via SETTINGS > PUBLISHING, paid for the registration and did the conversion to custom domain all within Blogger, never directly through Godaddy. Looks like most of those bloggers experiencing problems with custom domain did it via Godaddy.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Quote For the Day
We have two eyes
and just one tongue
which means we need
to look twice
and talk once
we have two ears
and just one mouth so
we need to listen
more than we talk
we have two hands and
one stomach
so we need to work
twice as much as me eat
we have two brains,
left and right,
and one heart
so we can think
twice
BUT LOVE ONLY ONE
and just one tongue
which means we need
to look twice
and talk once
we have two ears
and just one mouth so
we need to listen
more than we talk
we have two hands and
one stomach
so we need to work
twice as much as me eat
we have two brains,
left and right,
and one heart
so we can think
twice
BUT LOVE ONLY ONE
Monday, January 26, 2009
Past is Past
People say
"past is past"
you need
to move on
to see
the future but
how can you move on
when
your past
is the only thing
you ever wanted to be
with in the future
"past is past"
you need
to move on
to see
the future but
how can you move on
when
your past
is the only thing
you ever wanted to be
with in the future
Quote of the day
when people hurt me
i think of them
like a
sand paper
they may scratch me
and
hurt me
a
bit
but in the
end
i end up polished
and they end up
USELESS.....!!!!
i think of them
like a
sand paper
they may scratch me
and
hurt me
a
bit
but in the
end
i end up polished
and they end up
USELESS.....!!!!
Friday, January 23, 2009
does TRUE LOVE exist? question by "headed to nowhere"
yes.......
True Love Does Really exist in this world
its unexplainable
it has own reason.... and that reason is UNKNOWN
true love cant be seen in physical looks,mental ability,money......
kindness.....
but in the Heart...
mouth cant say...
brain cant think....
only the heart... can say... ^^
"Do i Love Him/Her???"
True Love Does Really exist in this world
its unexplainable
it has own reason.... and that reason is UNKNOWN
true love cant be seen in physical looks,mental ability,money......
kindness.....
but in the Heart...
mouth cant say...
brain cant think....
only the heart... can say... ^^
"Do i Love Him/Her???"
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Contact me
Send Letters To Dr. Love and let him solve your problem and
give you some
advice For FREE
Email:
soul_linker550@yahoo.com
Cellphone #:
+639154299794
mailing Adress:
#29 sampaguita St. San vicente
Tarlac Cit, Tarlac
Full name:
Alleo Indong
give you some
advice For FREE
Email:
soul_linker550@yahoo.com
Cellphone #:
+639154299794
mailing Adress:
#29 sampaguita St. San vicente
Tarlac Cit, Tarlac
Full name:
Alleo Indong
"I Feel Trapped in This Relationship"
Dear Dr, Love
I am a 20 year old female that is in a relationship with a 25 year old man. We have been going out for three months now, but we fell in love after going out for three weeks. The relationship was a dream come true until very recently.
My boyfriend asked me to stay with him during my school break from college (2 weeks). This seemed like a long period of time and I was a little nervous inside because of concern over my need for space.
Despite this apprehension, I agreed to the arrangement. He said that it has been the best time of his life while I felt like I was going crazy after the two weeks were over. I told him that I needed to go away for a few days so that I could have more freedom, more space, and get more things done. I complained that I felt like I had gotten married overnight. I was confined to the house most of the time. It took him a while to finally give me a key and I am isolated from transportation and friends. I felt like he wanted me to adapt to his ways of doing things instead of doing things my own way.
When I wasn't living with him, he would still come straight from work and take me out for a great time. Since I've been staying with him, we mostly go out to run errands, go to the grocery store, and take the trash out!
Every time he was around he wanted me to be with him (For example: if I was watching TV, he would want me to stop so that I could lay next to him while he was on the phone.) I told him that simple things make me feel in control (being able to come and go as I please, working outside the house, etc.) but I felt like he was trying to be in control. I told him that made me feel unhappy so I had to go back to my original environment for a little while.
Meanwhile, he keeps saying he wants to ask me to marry him someday, he wants me to have his children, he wants me to live with him permanently after I graduate in May. I'll admit that we've had some wonderful times together. But I'm feeling suffocated.
After we discussed these things, he voluntarily said he would change. He said he didn't think he was controlling but that possibly I thought so because of the way he said things and that he would try to be more careful. I told him that I am a very independent person and I need time for my own activities and interests. He said he will value my privacy more.
This is all nice but I am still feeling awkward about going back to stay with him. I feel more irritated by him that ever and my need for space seems to grow everyday.
I feel overwhelmed and confused. I keep telling myself that love will keep us together despite my recent doubts.
What should I do?
Trapped
This guy may be great and wonderful but you are in an entirely different life stage. You are definitely not ready to play house.
Your feelings are right when they tell you that being confined is not right for you at the age of 20. We need to keep in mind that he is five years older than you and may be more ready than you are. This relationship, as loving as it is, was not equipped to handle coming home and doing chores.
You had your best times when you could go out and have fun. You need to keep doing this. So many young people make the mistake of giving up their late adolescence and early adulthood, which is a time of discovery and experimentation, to be committed to someone they might eventually outgrow.
We change the most between the ages of 20 to 28. All your feelings of being stifled are telling you that you need to be much freer than you are with this young man. Your heart is telling you that you can't handle this so listen to it.
Try to go back to the stage where you are merely dating. Errands and chores at your age will deprive you of the period of experimentation and growth at the sacrifice of what he needs you to be.
I can't stress how strongly I feel that you need to break away from this and discover your own life as a separate individual before you make this kind of choice.
What if you wake up in five years and say, "My God, I've missed five years of my development!"
I guarantee you this is what will happen.
Your feelings are correct. Pay attention to them.
I am a 20 year old female that is in a relationship with a 25 year old man. We have been going out for three months now, but we fell in love after going out for three weeks. The relationship was a dream come true until very recently.
My boyfriend asked me to stay with him during my school break from college (2 weeks). This seemed like a long period of time and I was a little nervous inside because of concern over my need for space.
Despite this apprehension, I agreed to the arrangement. He said that it has been the best time of his life while I felt like I was going crazy after the two weeks were over. I told him that I needed to go away for a few days so that I could have more freedom, more space, and get more things done. I complained that I felt like I had gotten married overnight. I was confined to the house most of the time. It took him a while to finally give me a key and I am isolated from transportation and friends. I felt like he wanted me to adapt to his ways of doing things instead of doing things my own way.
When I wasn't living with him, he would still come straight from work and take me out for a great time. Since I've been staying with him, we mostly go out to run errands, go to the grocery store, and take the trash out!
Every time he was around he wanted me to be with him (For example: if I was watching TV, he would want me to stop so that I could lay next to him while he was on the phone.) I told him that simple things make me feel in control (being able to come and go as I please, working outside the house, etc.) but I felt like he was trying to be in control. I told him that made me feel unhappy so I had to go back to my original environment for a little while.
Meanwhile, he keeps saying he wants to ask me to marry him someday, he wants me to have his children, he wants me to live with him permanently after I graduate in May. I'll admit that we've had some wonderful times together. But I'm feeling suffocated.
After we discussed these things, he voluntarily said he would change. He said he didn't think he was controlling but that possibly I thought so because of the way he said things and that he would try to be more careful. I told him that I am a very independent person and I need time for my own activities and interests. He said he will value my privacy more.
This is all nice but I am still feeling awkward about going back to stay with him. I feel more irritated by him that ever and my need for space seems to grow everyday.
I feel overwhelmed and confused. I keep telling myself that love will keep us together despite my recent doubts.
What should I do?
Trapped
This guy may be great and wonderful but you are in an entirely different life stage. You are definitely not ready to play house.
Your feelings are right when they tell you that being confined is not right for you at the age of 20. We need to keep in mind that he is five years older than you and may be more ready than you are. This relationship, as loving as it is, was not equipped to handle coming home and doing chores.
You had your best times when you could go out and have fun. You need to keep doing this. So many young people make the mistake of giving up their late adolescence and early adulthood, which is a time of discovery and experimentation, to be committed to someone they might eventually outgrow.
We change the most between the ages of 20 to 28. All your feelings of being stifled are telling you that you need to be much freer than you are with this young man. Your heart is telling you that you can't handle this so listen to it.
Try to go back to the stage where you are merely dating. Errands and chores at your age will deprive you of the period of experimentation and growth at the sacrifice of what he needs you to be.
I can't stress how strongly I feel that you need to break away from this and discover your own life as a separate individual before you make this kind of choice.
What if you wake up in five years and say, "My God, I've missed five years of my development!"
I guarantee you this is what will happen.
Your feelings are correct. Pay attention to them.
Pasahe
Sa Isang Jeep
Pasahero: Mama, Magkano Po Yung Pasahe?
Driver: 7.50 Yung Minimum
Pasahero: (Dumukot Ito Sa Bulsa Para Kunin Yung Pera Niya, Ngunit sa Di Sinasadyang Dahilan Kulang Yung Pamasahe Niya.) Patay, Kulang Yung Pera Ko. Paano Kaya Ito? (Nag Isip Ito At Lumingon Sa Driver. Napansin Niya Na Duling Ito. Sabi Niya Sa Kanyang Sarili, Tama Duling Yung Driver Sigurado Pag Nagbigay Ako Ng 3.75 di Niya Mapapansin Na Kulang Yung Pera Ko. Kasi Doble Yung Paningin Nito. Inabot Niya Sa Driver Yung Pera.
Ngunit Laking Gulat Niya Nung May Sinabi Yung Driver Sa Kanya.
Driver: Kulang Ito!
Pasahero: Anong Kulang? Di Ba Sabi Mo 7.50 Yung Minimum?
Driver: Oo Nga 7.50 eh Dalawa Kaya Kayo.
Patay! Akala Mo Lusot Kana ha?
Pasahero: Mama, Magkano Po Yung Pasahe?
Driver: 7.50 Yung Minimum
Pasahero: (Dumukot Ito Sa Bulsa Para Kunin Yung Pera Niya, Ngunit sa Di Sinasadyang Dahilan Kulang Yung Pamasahe Niya.) Patay, Kulang Yung Pera Ko. Paano Kaya Ito? (Nag Isip Ito At Lumingon Sa Driver. Napansin Niya Na Duling Ito. Sabi Niya Sa Kanyang Sarili, Tama Duling Yung Driver Sigurado Pag Nagbigay Ako Ng 3.75 di Niya Mapapansin Na Kulang Yung Pera Ko. Kasi Doble Yung Paningin Nito. Inabot Niya Sa Driver Yung Pera.
Ngunit Laking Gulat Niya Nung May Sinabi Yung Driver Sa Kanya.
Driver: Kulang Ito!
Pasahero: Anong Kulang? Di Ba Sabi Mo 7.50 Yung Minimum?
Driver: Oo Nga 7.50 eh Dalawa Kaya Kayo.
Patay! Akala Mo Lusot Kana ha?
Lottery Winner
Sa States, isang Bikolano ang nanalo sa Lottery. Takbo agad siya sa Lottery Office para kunin ang ang pera.
Bikolano: I want my $20 million!
Lotto Official: No, Sir, Hindi po ganoon ang pag bayad namin. Sa umpisa, bibigyan ka namin ng 1 Million. Every year thereafter, Ibibigay namin sa iyo ang 1 Million.
Bikolano: Kailangan ko na ang buong pera ngayon!
Lotto Official: Talagang hindi pwedi dahil may kasulatan diyan sa likod ng ng ticket na hindi pwedi ang Lump Sum!
Bikolano: Look, I want my money now! Pag hindi niyo ibibigay ang $20 million ngayon, mabuti pa, Ibalik niyo na sa akin ang $1.00 na puhunan ko sa ticket!!!
Bikolano: I want my $20 million!
Lotto Official: No, Sir, Hindi po ganoon ang pag bayad namin. Sa umpisa, bibigyan ka namin ng 1 Million. Every year thereafter, Ibibigay namin sa iyo ang 1 Million.
Bikolano: Kailangan ko na ang buong pera ngayon!
Lotto Official: Talagang hindi pwedi dahil may kasulatan diyan sa likod ng ng ticket na hindi pwedi ang Lump Sum!
Bikolano: Look, I want my money now! Pag hindi niyo ibibigay ang $20 million ngayon, mabuti pa, Ibalik niyo na sa akin ang $1.00 na puhunan ko sa ticket!!!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I Will Love You Forever
I love you so deeply,
I love you so much,
I love the sound of your voice
And the way that we touch.
I love your warm smile
And your kind, thoughtful way,
The joy that you bring
To my life every day.
I love you today
As I have from the start,
And I'll love you forever
With all of my heart.
- Amanda Nicole Martinez -
I love you so much,
I love the sound of your voice
And the way that we touch.
I love your warm smile
And your kind, thoughtful way,
The joy that you bring
To my life every day.
I love you today
As I have from the start,
And I'll love you forever
With all of my heart.
- Amanda Nicole Martinez -
Love Is ...
Love is the greatest feeling,
Love is like a play,
Love is what I feel for you,
Each and every day,
Love is like a smile,
Love is like a song,
Love is a great emotion,
That keeps us going strong,
I love you with my heart,
My body and my soul,
I love the way I keep loving,
Like a love I can't control,
So remember when your eyes meet mine,
I love you with all my heart,
And I have poured my entire soul into you,
Right from the very start.
- Meghan -
Love is like a play,
Love is what I feel for you,
Each and every day,
Love is like a smile,
Love is like a song,
Love is a great emotion,
That keeps us going strong,
I love you with my heart,
My body and my soul,
I love the way I keep loving,
Like a love I can't control,
So remember when your eyes meet mine,
I love you with all my heart,
And I have poured my entire soul into you,
Right from the very start.
- Meghan -
Monday, January 19, 2009
Your Name
I wrote your name in the sky,
but the wind blew it away.
I wrote your name in the sand,
but the waves washed it away.
I wrote your name in my heart,
and forever it will stay.
- Jessica Blade -
but the wind blew it away.
I wrote your name in the sand,
but the waves washed it away.
I wrote your name in my heart,
and forever it will stay.
- Jessica Blade -
Never Have I Fallen
Your lips speak soft sweetness
Your touch a cool caress
I am lost in your magic
My heart beats within your chest
I think of you each morning
And dream of you each night
I think of your arms being around me
And cannot express my delight
Never have I fallen
But I am quickly on my way
You hold a heart in your hands
That has never before been given away
- Rex A. Williams -
Your touch a cool caress
I am lost in your magic
My heart beats within your chest
I think of you each morning
And dream of you each night
I think of your arms being around me
And cannot express my delight
Never have I fallen
But I am quickly on my way
You hold a heart in your hands
That has never before been given away
- Rex A. Williams -
Love poem 4
You're my man, my mighty king,
And I'm the jewel in your crown,
You're the sun so hot and bright,
I'm your light-rays shining down,
You're the sky so vast and blue,
And I'm the white clouds in your chest,
I'm a river clean and pure,
Who in your ocean finds her rest,
You're the mountain huge and high,
I'm the valley green and wide,
You're the body firm and strong,
And I'm a rib bone on your side,
You're an eagle flying high,
I'm your feathers light and brown,
You're my man, my king of kings,
And I'm the jewel in your crown.
- Nima Akbari -
And I'm the jewel in your crown,
You're the sun so hot and bright,
I'm your light-rays shining down,
You're the sky so vast and blue,
And I'm the white clouds in your chest,
I'm a river clean and pure,
Who in your ocean finds her rest,
You're the mountain huge and high,
I'm the valley green and wide,
You're the body firm and strong,
And I'm a rib bone on your side,
You're an eagle flying high,
I'm your feathers light and brown,
You're my man, my king of kings,
And I'm the jewel in your crown.
- Nima Akbari -
Love poem 3
A stranger you were once.
Then, with a gentle look you took my hand.
As our lives engaged,
you lit my life and I held both your hands.
Now that decades have passed,
ours souls have indeed become one.
How fortunate we are
that we have found the love so true
that everyone dreams about.
- Laura Veronica Merodio -
Then, with a gentle look you took my hand.
As our lives engaged,
you lit my life and I held both your hands.
Now that decades have passed,
ours souls have indeed become one.
How fortunate we are
that we have found the love so true
that everyone dreams about.
- Laura Veronica Merodio -
Love poem 2
A gentle word like a spark of light,
Illuminates my soul
And as each sound goes deeper,
It's YOU that makes me whole
There is no corner, no dark place,
YOUR LOVE cannot fill
And if the world starts causing waves,
It's your devotion that makes them still
And yes you always speak to me,
In sweet honesty and truth
Your caring heart keeps out the rain,
YOUR LOVE, the ultimate roof
So thank you my Love for being there,
For supporting me, my life
I'll do the same for you, you know,
My Beautiful, Darling Wife.
- David G. Kelly -
Illuminates my soul
And as each sound goes deeper,
It's YOU that makes me whole
There is no corner, no dark place,
YOUR LOVE cannot fill
And if the world starts causing waves,
It's your devotion that makes them still
And yes you always speak to me,
In sweet honesty and truth
Your caring heart keeps out the rain,
YOUR LOVE, the ultimate roof
So thank you my Love for being there,
For supporting me, my life
I'll do the same for you, you know,
My Beautiful, Darling Wife.
- David G. Kelly -
What I Love About You
I love the way you look at me,
Your eyes so bright and blue.
I love the way you kiss me,
Your lips so soft and smooth.
I love the way you make me so happy,
And the ways you show you care.
I love the way you say, "I Love You,"
And the way you're always there.
I love the way you touch me,
Always sending chills down my spine.
I love that you are with me,
And glad that you are mine.
- Crystal Jansen -
Your eyes so bright and blue.
I love the way you kiss me,
Your lips so soft and smooth.
I love the way you make me so happy,
And the ways you show you care.
I love the way you say, "I Love You,"
And the way you're always there.
I love the way you touch me,
Always sending chills down my spine.
I love that you are with me,
And glad that you are mine.
- Crystal Jansen -
Love poem
If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.
- Courtney Kuchta -
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.
- Courtney Kuchta -
An Entrapment
My love, I have tried with all my being
to grasp a form comparable to thine own,
but nothing seems worthy;
I know now why Shakespeare could not
compare his love to a summer’s day.
It would be a crime to denounce the beauty
of such a creature as thee,
to simply cast away the precision
God had placed in forging you.
Each facet of your being
whether it physical or spiritual
is an ensnarement
from which there is no release.
But I do not wish release.
I wish to stay entrapped forever.
With you for all eternity.
Our hearts, always as one.
- Anthony Kolos -
to grasp a form comparable to thine own,
but nothing seems worthy;
I know now why Shakespeare could not
compare his love to a summer’s day.
It would be a crime to denounce the beauty
of such a creature as thee,
to simply cast away the precision
God had placed in forging you.
Each facet of your being
whether it physical or spiritual
is an ensnarement
from which there is no release.
But I do not wish release.
I wish to stay entrapped forever.
With you for all eternity.
Our hearts, always as one.
- Anthony Kolos -
A special world
A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us fiercely in its womb.
Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.
And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.
- Sheelagh Lennon -
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us fiercely in its womb.
Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.
And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.
- Sheelagh Lennon -
"I'm In Love with Two Girls"
Dear Dr. Love
I feel really bad for having to write this as it's something I should be able to sort out myself but I can't.
Basically, I love two girls dearly and I can't choose between the two.
I met Anne 18 months ago� We had some great times at the beginning but I always found myself wanting more, but never did anything about it and worked hard at our relationship.
She's a lovely girl but always needs someone in her life, she's very dependent on people.
I found myself resenting her occasionally as I too needed attention and found myself always having to give it.
She's such a sweet girl, but sometimes too sweet and that frustrated me as she got walked over from time to time.
We ended up moving in together and everything seemed Ok.
Well, she was over the moon and found myself feeling more and more trapped. Having to convince her I loved and cared for her. This took it's toll on me.
Do I sound bad saying that ? We got on really well but were never on that same level you want out of a relationship.
I could explain things about work, life, music etc and it went straight over her head. I'd just get the "Ahh.."Erm.." Really".. As if it was never being taken it.
I never got over the fact that I could come home after a bad day and explain everything to her with no advice back, on the other hand I always had to be a pool of information for her.
One day at work a girl came to our offices. She was working with us for 9 weeks on work placement. We clicked in so many ways it scared me. We got on so well from the start.
I promised myself nothing would come of it as it was so evident that we really liked each other.
To cut a long story short we ended up kissing on a night out and that was it. She's such a beautiful girl, listens to everything I say and understands.. Always has good advice to give me etc.. We did the usual office fling bit and went for lunches, walks in the park etc�
I ended up moving out of my house with Anne and moving into my brother's house whilst still seeing Ellen, the new girl.
Anne had no idea what was going on. I never told her I was seeing someone else, I didn't want to hurt her more than I already had.
Now 3 months down the line I don't know which one I want to be with. I love Anne so much, but I also love Ellen with the same passion. It's like Ellen gives me what Anne doesn't and vice-versa.
Anne wants me back and Ellen and I are still together.
Part of me wants to "go home" and part of me is scared to stay with Ellen.
I'm so confused. I love them both very much.
I guess one of the main reasons I can't decide is because of where I am living. In a single room at my brother's house.
My house with Anne is cool, we had it set up nice.. I miss that. I miss her. But when I see her it's so different.
She's the same sweet sweet girl who wouldn't harm anyone� But at the same time she frustrates me because she's so "soft".
Ellen is the complete opposite. She's a strong girl and I love her for that.
Anne is working away at the moment. She won't be local to me for 3 or 4 months. I feel so lonely and desperate at times but how can I as I have Ellen? I miss Anne all the time but is it because I'm in a situation right now that I don't like so I go for the easiest option and go home.
But what about Ellen? I can't just walk out on that, I Love her. I can see us being together forever, but I thought that about Anne? I feel like such a shit. I never saw my life ending up like this, at 28 !
It seems so text-book. So, problem page in a mag.
I just wish I could turn the clock back.
Any advice is good advice, please help.
Regards, Tim
You can't love two people equally so lets get that straight right now.
I don't think the problem is choosing between two women: I think the problem is that you haven't really learned to take care of yourself fully yet in a grown up and adult fashion.
Here's what I mean. You are 28 years old and living with your brother.
You want to go back to Anne's house because she takes care of you. You don't have to bother setting up your own place because you so easily fit into hers.
In a sense, she is like a mother to you. She is soft, sweet, understanding, and puts up with you.
You also don't respect her quite as you should and think she is way too "soft." I think she represents the part of you that is childlike and needs to be taken care of. You imagine that you are taking care of her when actually she is taking care of you.
Ellen, on the other hand, is independent, passionate and self-sufficient. She also doesn't live near you so you don't have to really put this relationship to the test as of yet.
She represents another piece of yourself, the independent and sensual man. She attracts you greatly but you haven't been in the same place with her long enough to make a decision about her.
My belief is that when we are in a situation such as this, when we cannot choose between two people and feel "in love" with both, that we are not actually in love with either.
Both of these women satisfy a different need of yours.
Anne takes care of you, provides you with nice home, and makes you feel safe and nurtured.
Ellen is passionate and sexual which is the opposite side of the same coin.
I suggest that you may be deeply attracted to each of these women, but that you haven't evolved fully into your own life to actually make a decision as a mature adult.
Further, I haven't heard you say what you provide for either of these women. You seem way more focused on what they do for you.
In a mature adult relationship, we give and take equally. You are taking from both of these women, but what are you actually providing for either or both of them.
Here's my advice. Get your own life in working order before you make any decisions!
Move out of your brother's house and get your own place. Make sure your self-esteem is based on your own achievements and that you feel more fully evolved and centered whether that means working things out personally and/or professionally.
You don't mention your family background but my sense is that their may be some mother issue at play here.
You may think you are being good to these women, but, in reality, you are lying to both and misrepresenting your availability.
The bottom line is that we can't really and truly fall in love until we love and value ourselves. Other people cannot complete us or be used to fill up the empty spaces within ourselves.
I would work on my own life and feel more loving and complete within myself before putting pressure on myself to choose either of these ladies.
After you have grown a bit, you might be able to make a better decision, or, you might actually find someone completely different!
Good luck in your search, and please keep me posted as to your progress.
I feel really bad for having to write this as it's something I should be able to sort out myself but I can't.
Basically, I love two girls dearly and I can't choose between the two.
I met Anne 18 months ago� We had some great times at the beginning but I always found myself wanting more, but never did anything about it and worked hard at our relationship.
She's a lovely girl but always needs someone in her life, she's very dependent on people.
I found myself resenting her occasionally as I too needed attention and found myself always having to give it.
She's such a sweet girl, but sometimes too sweet and that frustrated me as she got walked over from time to time.
We ended up moving in together and everything seemed Ok.
Well, she was over the moon and found myself feeling more and more trapped. Having to convince her I loved and cared for her. This took it's toll on me.
Do I sound bad saying that ? We got on really well but were never on that same level you want out of a relationship.
I could explain things about work, life, music etc and it went straight over her head. I'd just get the "Ahh.."Erm.." Really".. As if it was never being taken it.
I never got over the fact that I could come home after a bad day and explain everything to her with no advice back, on the other hand I always had to be a pool of information for her.
One day at work a girl came to our offices. She was working with us for 9 weeks on work placement. We clicked in so many ways it scared me. We got on so well from the start.
I promised myself nothing would come of it as it was so evident that we really liked each other.
To cut a long story short we ended up kissing on a night out and that was it. She's such a beautiful girl, listens to everything I say and understands.. Always has good advice to give me etc.. We did the usual office fling bit and went for lunches, walks in the park etc�
I ended up moving out of my house with Anne and moving into my brother's house whilst still seeing Ellen, the new girl.
Anne had no idea what was going on. I never told her I was seeing someone else, I didn't want to hurt her more than I already had.
Now 3 months down the line I don't know which one I want to be with. I love Anne so much, but I also love Ellen with the same passion. It's like Ellen gives me what Anne doesn't and vice-versa.
Anne wants me back and Ellen and I are still together.
Part of me wants to "go home" and part of me is scared to stay with Ellen.
I'm so confused. I love them both very much.
I guess one of the main reasons I can't decide is because of where I am living. In a single room at my brother's house.
My house with Anne is cool, we had it set up nice.. I miss that. I miss her. But when I see her it's so different.
She's the same sweet sweet girl who wouldn't harm anyone� But at the same time she frustrates me because she's so "soft".
Ellen is the complete opposite. She's a strong girl and I love her for that.
Anne is working away at the moment. She won't be local to me for 3 or 4 months. I feel so lonely and desperate at times but how can I as I have Ellen? I miss Anne all the time but is it because I'm in a situation right now that I don't like so I go for the easiest option and go home.
But what about Ellen? I can't just walk out on that, I Love her. I can see us being together forever, but I thought that about Anne? I feel like such a shit. I never saw my life ending up like this, at 28 !
It seems so text-book. So, problem page in a mag.
I just wish I could turn the clock back.
Any advice is good advice, please help.
Regards, Tim
You can't love two people equally so lets get that straight right now.
I don't think the problem is choosing between two women: I think the problem is that you haven't really learned to take care of yourself fully yet in a grown up and adult fashion.
Here's what I mean. You are 28 years old and living with your brother.
You want to go back to Anne's house because she takes care of you. You don't have to bother setting up your own place because you so easily fit into hers.
In a sense, she is like a mother to you. She is soft, sweet, understanding, and puts up with you.
You also don't respect her quite as you should and think she is way too "soft." I think she represents the part of you that is childlike and needs to be taken care of. You imagine that you are taking care of her when actually she is taking care of you.
Ellen, on the other hand, is independent, passionate and self-sufficient. She also doesn't live near you so you don't have to really put this relationship to the test as of yet.
She represents another piece of yourself, the independent and sensual man. She attracts you greatly but you haven't been in the same place with her long enough to make a decision about her.
My belief is that when we are in a situation such as this, when we cannot choose between two people and feel "in love" with both, that we are not actually in love with either.
Both of these women satisfy a different need of yours.
Anne takes care of you, provides you with nice home, and makes you feel safe and nurtured.
Ellen is passionate and sexual which is the opposite side of the same coin.
I suggest that you may be deeply attracted to each of these women, but that you haven't evolved fully into your own life to actually make a decision as a mature adult.
Further, I haven't heard you say what you provide for either of these women. You seem way more focused on what they do for you.
In a mature adult relationship, we give and take equally. You are taking from both of these women, but what are you actually providing for either or both of them.
Here's my advice. Get your own life in working order before you make any decisions!
Move out of your brother's house and get your own place. Make sure your self-esteem is based on your own achievements and that you feel more fully evolved and centered whether that means working things out personally and/or professionally.
You don't mention your family background but my sense is that their may be some mother issue at play here.
You may think you are being good to these women, but, in reality, you are lying to both and misrepresenting your availability.
The bottom line is that we can't really and truly fall in love until we love and value ourselves. Other people cannot complete us or be used to fill up the empty spaces within ourselves.
I would work on my own life and feel more loving and complete within myself before putting pressure on myself to choose either of these ladies.
After you have grown a bit, you might be able to make a better decision, or, you might actually find someone completely different!
Good luck in your search, and please keep me posted as to your progress.
another Quote
The first time my heart was broken I thought I was through; I swore I'd never love again and believe me this was true, but when you walked into my life the second your eyes met mine, I knew you were worth loving, just like before, just like the first time.
"My fiancee doesn't want to discuss 'problems' in our relationship"
Dear Dr. Love
I am getting married in four months. I have been engaged for four years. However, my fiancee and I have at least two major issues. I just don't know if this is serious enough for me to consider backing down from marriage.
My fiancee and I are not seeing eye to eye on money issues. He feels that when we are married once the bills are paid for each person should have allowance money to spend. The catch is the other person should not ask what the money was spent on.
An example is, he spends money on CD's or a football jersey that's over $200.00. If he used it from his allowance money I should not complain. I'm not ok with this. My parents have been together for over 30 years and consult every detail of their expenses together. My fiancee feels that this is like "reporting" to the mate.
My other problem is that whenever something bothers me (other than money matters), I feel I can't tell him without getting upset.
I email him or try over the phone. This doesn't work. He never wants to hear the bad he only wants things to always be on the upbeat. However, I have issues I want to discuss.
I feel he keeps me from expressing my feelings which turn into resentment. Lately, I have really been questioning my relationship.
Please help me. I'm getting married in four months and am afraid of failing. Please Help ME!!!! Any advice will much be appreciated. I need to hear an expert's advice.
THank you,
Miss G.
You are right about one thing: these issues will not go away once you are married and need to be resolved ASAP.
Before I get into the issues themselves, you two need to seek some kind of premarital counseling before the wedding. Many couples do this with excellent results. You two have known each other for four years. I wonder why you are just beginning to get scared.
You are with someone who basically does not allow you to communicate with him and who shuts out anything he doesn't want to hear. How can a relationship progress unless the two of you can really talk.
While I think each partner should have discretionary cash to spend as they choose, your problems are way deeper than money. As a rule, money issues are usually symbolic of deeper problems. I think your fiance, for whatever reason, has difficulty dealing with anything he doesn't want to hear.
Marriage is a long and serious lifetime arrangement. It is virtually impossible that issues won't arise which he will need to address.
You obviously come from parents who had an exceptionally close relationship. You are engaged to someone who believes that nothing serious needs to or can be discussed. This belief system does not bode well for a relationship in which problems which come up can be solved and the fact that you are already feeling resentment is a bad sign.
My advice is to tell him that you need to find some kind of forum in which you two can talk about the underlying issues before you go ahead with this marriage.
What else can you do unless you plan to hold things in for the rest of your lives together! Tell him that your mutual future happiness with each other depends on open and honest communication.
Frankly, without it, this marriage, or any relationship for that matter, doesn't stand much of a chance.
I am getting married in four months. I have been engaged for four years. However, my fiancee and I have at least two major issues. I just don't know if this is serious enough for me to consider backing down from marriage.
My fiancee and I are not seeing eye to eye on money issues. He feels that when we are married once the bills are paid for each person should have allowance money to spend. The catch is the other person should not ask what the money was spent on.
An example is, he spends money on CD's or a football jersey that's over $200.00. If he used it from his allowance money I should not complain. I'm not ok with this. My parents have been together for over 30 years and consult every detail of their expenses together. My fiancee feels that this is like "reporting" to the mate.
My other problem is that whenever something bothers me (other than money matters), I feel I can't tell him without getting upset.
I email him or try over the phone. This doesn't work. He never wants to hear the bad he only wants things to always be on the upbeat. However, I have issues I want to discuss.
I feel he keeps me from expressing my feelings which turn into resentment. Lately, I have really been questioning my relationship.
Please help me. I'm getting married in four months and am afraid of failing. Please Help ME!!!! Any advice will much be appreciated. I need to hear an expert's advice.
THank you,
Miss G.
You are right about one thing: these issues will not go away once you are married and need to be resolved ASAP.
Before I get into the issues themselves, you two need to seek some kind of premarital counseling before the wedding. Many couples do this with excellent results. You two have known each other for four years. I wonder why you are just beginning to get scared.
You are with someone who basically does not allow you to communicate with him and who shuts out anything he doesn't want to hear. How can a relationship progress unless the two of you can really talk.
While I think each partner should have discretionary cash to spend as they choose, your problems are way deeper than money. As a rule, money issues are usually symbolic of deeper problems. I think your fiance, for whatever reason, has difficulty dealing with anything he doesn't want to hear.
Marriage is a long and serious lifetime arrangement. It is virtually impossible that issues won't arise which he will need to address.
You obviously come from parents who had an exceptionally close relationship. You are engaged to someone who believes that nothing serious needs to or can be discussed. This belief system does not bode well for a relationship in which problems which come up can be solved and the fact that you are already feeling resentment is a bad sign.
My advice is to tell him that you need to find some kind of forum in which you two can talk about the underlying issues before you go ahead with this marriage.
What else can you do unless you plan to hold things in for the rest of your lives together! Tell him that your mutual future happiness with each other depends on open and honest communication.
Frankly, without it, this marriage, or any relationship for that matter, doesn't stand much of a chance.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
More Txt Msg Quotes
Never rush in love for it never runs out. Let love be the one to knock at your door, so by the time you start to fall, you know that your feeling is for sure.
Love has its ups and downs, its twists and turns. Love leaves you pain, teaches you until you learn and even if love takes so long, it always takes you to where you belong.
Women listen to music because they are in love. Men listen to music because they want to fall in love.
Some people don't get any respect at all because they are asking for the respect they deserve.
You don't marry someone you can live with. You marry the person who you cannot live without.
There is no such a thing as ignorance, but only degrees of wisdom.
Love is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end, coz love is all there is.
Traffic. The black spell that makes commuters forget they are in love.
Love and stars are similar in one way. They keep you looking up every night.
There are two things rain helps improve: agricultural production and Philippine population.
It's better to lose your pride with someone you love, rather than lose that someone with your useless pride.
The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.
When everything goes wrong, push! When you wish for something, push! When people don't understand, push. When you wish for love, P-ush U- ntil S-omething H-appens!
Guilt: The inner voice that tells us that Someone may be looking.
Being single is cool. No worrying about anyone, no obligations and best of all, no heartaches. But you know what? If you will never get your heart broken, you will never learn to love.
Looking at men who are drunk is a mistake. Looking at women who are drunk is a temptation.
Women fall in love through their ears, and men through their eyes.
Each of us is a star. Sometimes we shine with the rest. Sometimes we twinkle alone. Sometimes when we least know it, we make someone's wish come true.
Home is the only place where one does not get homesick.
Every ten seconds, somewhere on this earth, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and most often in the tongue of the liar.
A person is happy if he has a problem and enjoys solving it.
Girls are like cell phones, they like to be held and talked to, but press the wrong button and you're disconnected. Guys are like buses. If you miss that one, another will be along soon.
It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good too to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven't lost the things that money cannot buy!
In love, there is always one who kisses and one who offers the cheek.
Relationships are like traffic signs 1-way, 2-way, do not enter, no U turn, no left turn, but the best so far is give way and keep right.
Being happy all the time is kind of boring.
When you love somebody, be ready to take the intensity of emotions. Be jealous, anxious. Love with all your might. Take the pain and everything that comes with it. Just make sure that the person is worth it.
Words and hearts should be handled with care... for words when spoken and hearts when broken are the hardest things to repair.
It's amazing how one person can bring you so much happiness and pain in your life. Maybe it's really love knocking when he can make you so happy that you forget all the pains. So don't forget all the happiness when he breaks your heart.
It takes three seconds to say I love you, three minutes to explain, three hours to demonstrate, three days to appreciate, three terms to produce it, but a lifetime to prove it.
The best thing about an enemy is that he tells the truth about you.
Say good about yourself and you'll be called arrogant; say bad about yourself and you'll be believed.
Some flowers grow best in the sun; others do well in the shade. God plants us where we grow best and gives us loved ones to grow with.
There is no absolute freedom. When your girlfriend says, "I love you", that is her freedom. But then again, will you let her say, "I love you" to every man.
Love can never be taught for it is to be learned; love can never be bought for it is to be given; love can never be kept for it is to be free; love can never be old for it lives to last a lifetime.
When a battered wife learns to fight back, blame the husband. He showed signs of weakness. When a battered husband learns to fight back, blame the wife. She took too far.
Love is magic. The more we hide it, the more it shows; the more you suppress it, the more it grows.
It is always a pleasure to listen to persons bragging about their humility.
We forgive those who bore us but cannot forgive those whom we bore.
"He says he loves me but won't kiss me"
Dear Dr. Love
I've been seeing a guy on/off for about 4 years now. (Both 22) We were instantly attracted the day we met 6 yrs ago at work and that day he asked me out but I said no, don't get me wrong I should have, I had butterflies in my stomach but did not know anything about the guy and was scared.
We used to flirt like crazy with each other until he lost his job and I didn't see him for a year. We bumped into each other and things started happening despite the fact he was with someone. It ended with them but then I went to university so we both thought a relationship would be hard so we didn't get together.
Since then we have both been in relationships whilst being involved with each other, sometimes physically but mainly just emotionally, we would phone and text each other daily despite me being away at school. For the past year we have been unofficially seeing each other off and on, he says he doesn't want a relationship with anyone right now (he doesn't know why, he just doesn't). I've asked if he thinks we will ever have a relationship in the future and he just doesn't know but admitted if we did it would be great.
He constantly reassures me he cares for me and has strong feelings for me as I do him. We both say we don't want to lose each other as we have grown so close we regard each other as best friends. To add to the complication he says he doesn't like kissing. I know he has done so with his gfs (he says he didn't particularly like it then either) but he won't kiss me. We do everything but he can't give me a solid reason for this either, just says he doesn't particularly like it.
This and the non-commitment causes arguments and sometimes either one of us calls it a day saying we should just be platonic friends, every time we do we end up with each other again. I've walked away from the whole situation three times before, taking advice from friends, thinking it would be better for us. But because I class him as one of my best friends it hurts me, I don't want to give up such a good friendship. He refuses to give my things back and tells me it's because he doesn't want to let go. Each time I do this it hurts him badly and I don't want to do it again.
Is this guy stringing me along? I don't think so but why wont he kiss or commit to me? Is this normal? Should I stop reading too much into this and not need a label on our relationship?
I am happy with him the way things are but need a clearer view of if this is a lost cause or if there is a more secure future ahead.
Confused
You are right, you are confused, and, by the way, so is he.
I am sure that if you read this letter over again, or, had you received such a letter from a friend, you would tell them to run from this young man, and not look back.
Seriously, just how many red flags have to wave before you can see there is no future here and, if there is, it is bleak! Here is a guy who says he loves you, but is involved intermittently with others, who won't kiss you ( heaven knows why!) , who won't commit to you, and, who says they don't really want to get involved on the girlfriend/boyfriend level. Why do you think there is a chance for something to happen? I literally don't see your reasoning.
Further, you are asking the wrong questions. The question should not be whether or not he has genuine feelings for you but rather, whether he can ever be emotionally stable enough to make you happy. (I doubt it.) As well as you might think you know, believe me, you don't. There are far too many things about him that are "mysterious" and which he refused to give you any satisfactory answers for.
I realize you met him when you were just 16 and, at that age, all kinds of romantic fantasies occur, but now you are 22 and are still thinking like a girl of 16. Please, grow up!! Whatever this guy is telling you may be true and I am sure he doesn't want to lose you, but what do you really have: a guy who frustrates you who won't commit. Why do you think this is going to change?
I think you are just hung up on the 6 year old fantasy that makes your heart beat faster when you think of him. Fine, but don't you think he has just taken "hard to get " to the point of absurdity. How good can all this make you feel. To me, it speaks of just plain misery spiced with a little excitement. This is hardly my idea of a relationship with a future.
As far as a platonic relationship goes, I don't think that would be possible until you no longer want anything more from it. It is just going to get harder and harder to sustain because you are so attracted to him. Remember, attraction is only one part of a relationship. Loyalty, commitment, responsibility and maturity make up the rest.
My advice: end it. Yes, even the friendship. At least for now. Why do you need someone who doesn't give you what you need. How good a friend is he if he gives you such mixed messages. Do you really think that this skewed communication is friendship? I know it will be hard because you are kind of addicted to the push-pull aspect of this and the imbalance it causes but he is nothing more than a bad drug of which you need to totally break the habit and get it out of your system, once and for all.
Believe me, I am right. Turn away and don't look back.
I've been seeing a guy on/off for about 4 years now. (Both 22) We were instantly attracted the day we met 6 yrs ago at work and that day he asked me out but I said no, don't get me wrong I should have, I had butterflies in my stomach but did not know anything about the guy and was scared.
We used to flirt like crazy with each other until he lost his job and I didn't see him for a year. We bumped into each other and things started happening despite the fact he was with someone. It ended with them but then I went to university so we both thought a relationship would be hard so we didn't get together.
Since then we have both been in relationships whilst being involved with each other, sometimes physically but mainly just emotionally, we would phone and text each other daily despite me being away at school. For the past year we have been unofficially seeing each other off and on, he says he doesn't want a relationship with anyone right now (he doesn't know why, he just doesn't). I've asked if he thinks we will ever have a relationship in the future and he just doesn't know but admitted if we did it would be great.
He constantly reassures me he cares for me and has strong feelings for me as I do him. We both say we don't want to lose each other as we have grown so close we regard each other as best friends. To add to the complication he says he doesn't like kissing. I know he has done so with his gfs (he says he didn't particularly like it then either) but he won't kiss me. We do everything but he can't give me a solid reason for this either, just says he doesn't particularly like it.
This and the non-commitment causes arguments and sometimes either one of us calls it a day saying we should just be platonic friends, every time we do we end up with each other again. I've walked away from the whole situation three times before, taking advice from friends, thinking it would be better for us. But because I class him as one of my best friends it hurts me, I don't want to give up such a good friendship. He refuses to give my things back and tells me it's because he doesn't want to let go. Each time I do this it hurts him badly and I don't want to do it again.
Is this guy stringing me along? I don't think so but why wont he kiss or commit to me? Is this normal? Should I stop reading too much into this and not need a label on our relationship?
I am happy with him the way things are but need a clearer view of if this is a lost cause or if there is a more secure future ahead.
Confused
You are right, you are confused, and, by the way, so is he.
I am sure that if you read this letter over again, or, had you received such a letter from a friend, you would tell them to run from this young man, and not look back.
Seriously, just how many red flags have to wave before you can see there is no future here and, if there is, it is bleak! Here is a guy who says he loves you, but is involved intermittently with others, who won't kiss you ( heaven knows why!) , who won't commit to you, and, who says they don't really want to get involved on the girlfriend/boyfriend level. Why do you think there is a chance for something to happen? I literally don't see your reasoning.
Further, you are asking the wrong questions. The question should not be whether or not he has genuine feelings for you but rather, whether he can ever be emotionally stable enough to make you happy. (I doubt it.) As well as you might think you know, believe me, you don't. There are far too many things about him that are "mysterious" and which he refused to give you any satisfactory answers for.
I realize you met him when you were just 16 and, at that age, all kinds of romantic fantasies occur, but now you are 22 and are still thinking like a girl of 16. Please, grow up!! Whatever this guy is telling you may be true and I am sure he doesn't want to lose you, but what do you really have: a guy who frustrates you who won't commit. Why do you think this is going to change?
I think you are just hung up on the 6 year old fantasy that makes your heart beat faster when you think of him. Fine, but don't you think he has just taken "hard to get " to the point of absurdity. How good can all this make you feel. To me, it speaks of just plain misery spiced with a little excitement. This is hardly my idea of a relationship with a future.
As far as a platonic relationship goes, I don't think that would be possible until you no longer want anything more from it. It is just going to get harder and harder to sustain because you are so attracted to him. Remember, attraction is only one part of a relationship. Loyalty, commitment, responsibility and maturity make up the rest.
My advice: end it. Yes, even the friendship. At least for now. Why do you need someone who doesn't give you what you need. How good a friend is he if he gives you such mixed messages. Do you really think that this skewed communication is friendship? I know it will be hard because you are kind of addicted to the push-pull aspect of this and the imbalance it causes but he is nothing more than a bad drug of which you need to totally break the habit and get it out of your system, once and for all.
Believe me, I am right. Turn away and don't look back.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Get Free Traffic
"I have a girlfriend - but all I can think about is the old one!
Dear Dr. Love,
I met this girl back in high school, over 10 years ago now. We instantly had this connection with each other, and from what I remember the teacher had sat us together to try and stop us both from disrupting her class! Anyway, we started hanging out more and more - first with her friends, then more on our own, etc.
The relationship really blossomed over the years, and we had shared a great many personal, deep secrets and feelings with each other. I feel that this woman now knows me best out of anybody - possibly even my own mother. People would comment on what a good couple we made - except they didn't know we were just friends.
Although I felt strong feelings of love towards her soon into the relationship, I never made my feelings known for fear of rejection. This has been going on up until now.
I had to endure the relative torture of seeing other men date her, most of them were abusive, generally losers. I have tried not to be bias in forming those opinions, I do believe it's true - hell, even she agrees.
So, fast forward to the present day, and she now has a little girl - the father has absolutely nothing to do with them, did a runner very soon after she was born. I was the closest thing that little girl had for a father.
I got involved with another girl, who is now my girlfriend. We live together at this moment. It seemed that neither of the two girls liked this. Maybe my girlfriend could tell my feelings. My 'true' love just didn't like me being with my girlfriend for some reason; I got a text message from her to say she didn't want to see me any more.
So, here I am, still with that girlfriend, still living with her. To be honest I have rushed into this relationship and don't feel like I really do love her at all - in fact I'd rather be on my own than lead her on.
I have not been able to forget or 'get over' the original girl, I am dreaming of her when asleep, thinking of her when awake.
So after 7 or 8 months of not seeing or contacting her, I contacted the girl I have these intense feelings for, and she has responded. She wants to meet up - and soon.
I am seriously considering meeting with her at an old pub we used to go to, and then taking her on a walk we used to do down the lanes. During the walk I intend to make my feelings for her crystal clear, and ask her what she thinks.
If she says no, I don't think I'd be able to face her again. If she says yes, I would totally be there for her and her little girl. I'd love her for all eternity, and marry her in a heartbeat!
Clearly, there are a number of complications here. First of all there are joint ownerships of high value items with my current girlfriend, there is still a large period left on the rental agreement, her family has accepted me and I play squash with her brother. If I move out of the flat, I'll need a new place - it's questionable whether I can afford it on my own.
There are a lot of bridges to burn here, and massive risk involved in going down this route - but if don't act now, I will forever regret it. I'm sure that this is the last opportunity I am ever going to have.
Oh yeah, we are both 23.
What do you make of all this?
Thanks,
M.
My first suggestion is to see the movie "Match Point" by Woody Allen. You are definitely that boy.
You love someone you say "deeply" but money and comfort mean more to you than love. You live with someone whose family has taken you in and accepted you and you are not really being honest with your live in, but you are too scared of making your own way in the world and taking on adult responsibility.
Second, I hear that you don't feel capable of supporting yourself and that living on your own, without the support of your current g.f. would be too hard to handle. Does that sound like an adult male to you? Exactly.
So let me ask....what do you do? Are you capable of being emotionally and financially independent? Can you really take on the responsibility of a mother and daughter? That is a pretty big order.
Also, it sounds like the girl you love gave you a chance but that you weren't able to break with the other girl. She did right by refusing to see you. Who needs someone that ambivalent?
I think that even though you don't really want the one you have, you are afraid to go for what you really want. Honestly, that just cheats everyone: you, girl number one and girl number two as well.
I also wonder what the emotional health is of the girl you say you love if she has chosen abusive or unstable relationships. What makes you think it will be any different with you?
Okay, so what should you do?
First, for goodness sakes, start to be honest at least with yourself and stop living the lie you are living just for the convenience of a nice life style.
Talk to the girl you love and tell her the truth: you want to marry her and leave your current live in. See if she is open to that. If you don't approach her, you will probably always regret it. Second, be a gentleman to the girl you live with. She sounds like a good person and at least deserves your honesty.
Third, remember that 23 is not very old. The most important task at your age is to establish yourself as an independent and mature entity that can support himself as well as a potential life partner. It doesn't sound like you are quite there yet, does it?
At the very least, both of these young women deserve someone who can "man up" truthfully and openly and end the deceit of your present situation.
I hope I have given you an answer that will be helpful to you. Good luck and keep me posted.
Sincerely,
Dr.Love
I met this girl back in high school, over 10 years ago now. We instantly had this connection with each other, and from what I remember the teacher had sat us together to try and stop us both from disrupting her class! Anyway, we started hanging out more and more - first with her friends, then more on our own, etc.
The relationship really blossomed over the years, and we had shared a great many personal, deep secrets and feelings with each other. I feel that this woman now knows me best out of anybody - possibly even my own mother. People would comment on what a good couple we made - except they didn't know we were just friends.
Although I felt strong feelings of love towards her soon into the relationship, I never made my feelings known for fear of rejection. This has been going on up until now.
I had to endure the relative torture of seeing other men date her, most of them were abusive, generally losers. I have tried not to be bias in forming those opinions, I do believe it's true - hell, even she agrees.
So, fast forward to the present day, and she now has a little girl - the father has absolutely nothing to do with them, did a runner very soon after she was born. I was the closest thing that little girl had for a father.
I got involved with another girl, who is now my girlfriend. We live together at this moment. It seemed that neither of the two girls liked this. Maybe my girlfriend could tell my feelings. My 'true' love just didn't like me being with my girlfriend for some reason; I got a text message from her to say she didn't want to see me any more.
So, here I am, still with that girlfriend, still living with her. To be honest I have rushed into this relationship and don't feel like I really do love her at all - in fact I'd rather be on my own than lead her on.
I have not been able to forget or 'get over' the original girl, I am dreaming of her when asleep, thinking of her when awake.
So after 7 or 8 months of not seeing or contacting her, I contacted the girl I have these intense feelings for, and she has responded. She wants to meet up - and soon.
I am seriously considering meeting with her at an old pub we used to go to, and then taking her on a walk we used to do down the lanes. During the walk I intend to make my feelings for her crystal clear, and ask her what she thinks.
If she says no, I don't think I'd be able to face her again. If she says yes, I would totally be there for her and her little girl. I'd love her for all eternity, and marry her in a heartbeat!
Clearly, there are a number of complications here. First of all there are joint ownerships of high value items with my current girlfriend, there is still a large period left on the rental agreement, her family has accepted me and I play squash with her brother. If I move out of the flat, I'll need a new place - it's questionable whether I can afford it on my own.
There are a lot of bridges to burn here, and massive risk involved in going down this route - but if don't act now, I will forever regret it. I'm sure that this is the last opportunity I am ever going to have.
Oh yeah, we are both 23.
What do you make of all this?
Thanks,
M.
My first suggestion is to see the movie "Match Point" by Woody Allen. You are definitely that boy.
You love someone you say "deeply" but money and comfort mean more to you than love. You live with someone whose family has taken you in and accepted you and you are not really being honest with your live in, but you are too scared of making your own way in the world and taking on adult responsibility.
Second, I hear that you don't feel capable of supporting yourself and that living on your own, without the support of your current g.f. would be too hard to handle. Does that sound like an adult male to you? Exactly.
So let me ask....what do you do? Are you capable of being emotionally and financially independent? Can you really take on the responsibility of a mother and daughter? That is a pretty big order.
Also, it sounds like the girl you love gave you a chance but that you weren't able to break with the other girl. She did right by refusing to see you. Who needs someone that ambivalent?
I think that even though you don't really want the one you have, you are afraid to go for what you really want. Honestly, that just cheats everyone: you, girl number one and girl number two as well.
I also wonder what the emotional health is of the girl you say you love if she has chosen abusive or unstable relationships. What makes you think it will be any different with you?
Okay, so what should you do?
First, for goodness sakes, start to be honest at least with yourself and stop living the lie you are living just for the convenience of a nice life style.
Talk to the girl you love and tell her the truth: you want to marry her and leave your current live in. See if she is open to that. If you don't approach her, you will probably always regret it. Second, be a gentleman to the girl you live with. She sounds like a good person and at least deserves your honesty.
Third, remember that 23 is not very old. The most important task at your age is to establish yourself as an independent and mature entity that can support himself as well as a potential life partner. It doesn't sound like you are quite there yet, does it?
At the very least, both of these young women deserve someone who can "man up" truthfully and openly and end the deceit of your present situation.
I hope I have given you an answer that will be helpful to you. Good luck and keep me posted.
Sincerely,
Dr.Love
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
"Great Boyfriend - But I Don't Want to Settle Down!"
Dear Dr. Love
I'm 20 years old in my second relationship. In my past I have struggled with over 50 shallow crushes. I would obsess over a guy and fantasize until reality set in and I realized it would not work.
The relationship I am in right now is the only time I have ever gotten to know a guy first before developing feelings for him.
"Jake" is everything I could want in a guy. He is incredibly loyal, genuine, trustworthy, understanding, considerate, and affectionate. This is his first relationship and he's still figuring out how to be a good b/f. We have very similar backgrounds and beliefs. I know this relationship can go somewhere far. We have amazingly open communication compared to other relationships.
However, it is becoming serious really quickly. We have been dating for over 3 months, 2 of those have been spent long distance with little communication because of his location. While we have been apart, I have been receiving a lot of unwanted attention from males because I am attractive and a swing dancer. I love to dance and did not go looking for other romantic involvements. I have dealt with all but one of these advancements.
One of these guys "Matt" is incredibly attractive and shares similar beliefs. He is a really genuine, caring person which contrasts the other shallow crushes of my past. And he has feelings for me. But I am in a relationship!
I will go back to school for one more year so I will be with Jake during that time. There is no way things could ever work out with Matt because of the distance unless I go to grad school near him. How can I even be entertaining these thoughts?
I know I am getting afraid of commitment with Jake even though I do really like him and I know this relationship is substantial. He is so trusting of me though, should I share my feelings towards Matt at the risk of hurting Jake?
I am nowhere ready to be married. I will be in grad school for 6 years after graduation. Jake will still have one more year at school. I am just not sure if I am ready to settle down for good without really playing the field. But I know if I were to go back into the field, I'd only want to be in a relationship again.
It's really nice to have the stability, but I feel so guilty about my attraction toward Matt.
Is it possible to maintain a friendship with Matt? I really don't know him well but I am intrigued by his personality. He represents all of those shallow past crushes that were unobtained.
I have a tendency to be flighty, and I want to make things work out with Jake because it is so good for both of us, but to be serious at 20 without thinking of marriage until at least 4 more years?
It scares me but I don't want to run away from a good thing only to regret it later.
This is so selfish of me. I can't get Matt out of my mind but I don't want to lead him on and hurt him also...
Perplexed
Let me start out by saying that twenty is way to young to settle down and make a decision about marriage but it is not too young to have a serious boyfriend.
Actually, many intelligent and educated young women such as yourself have several "serious" boyfriends before they actually decided to get married. I think it is progress on your part that you actually have met someone like Jake who has intrigued you sufficiently to want to settle down at least temporarily.
On the other hand, your attraction to "Matt" should also tell you that you are not in the least ready for a permanent commitment.
One of the things that I found interesting was your description of your fifty short term "crushes". I think that is not unusual but it leads me to wonder how you feel about long term relationships in general. We usually grow up forming these kinds of decisions on the way our parents' relationship was handled.
Ask yourself the following questions:
1) Do I come from an intact family?
2) How did my father and mother interact with each other?
3) Did I perceive my parents marriage as happy, or did they basically seem like being together was kind of a drag?
You seem to be very fearful of any kind of personal commitment and describe yourself as flighty. I wonder if you feel that if someone got to know you better, maybe they would find you wanting.
Basically, in examining why people are so scared of getting closer, we have to look at basic self-esteem, early childhood issues, maturity, and overall readiness to decide on a life partner.
Since I know nothing of your early childhood, based on what you have told me, I assume that while you may be getting ready to actually have a real boyfriend, you wonder how you could be so attracted to someone else.
Actually, this is quite common but in your situation, I think that something about "settling down" just terrifies you.
Since you are going to be in school next year with Jake, it is a perfect time to settle into having a steady boyfriend and to enjoy the security that this brings without necessarily deciding on marriage. At twenty, that is a scary thought. You can just enjoy the good feelings and tell yourself that you are far from ready to even think about marriage. And that is absolutely true.
Just because you like or even love one guy, this doesn't stop us from feeling attracted to other guys, especially cute flirtatious ones like Matt.
I think that, really, you just love the attention and you think that by only being with one guy, you will have to give this up. This is also not true. Attention from the opposite sex is always fun, and just because we make a commitment doesn't mean we have to stop interacting with everyone else.
Above all, stop worrying about this. Enjoy the male attention you get. That's really fun. When you start the semester with Jake, just see how it goes and don't worry about marriage and the future. That freaks everybody out.
You will know what to do when you a truly ready emotionally. Right now, you aren't but that doesn't mean you can't enjoy the present. That's where all the fun is anyway.
Thanks for your letter and keep me posted.
I'm 20 years old in my second relationship. In my past I have struggled with over 50 shallow crushes. I would obsess over a guy and fantasize until reality set in and I realized it would not work.
The relationship I am in right now is the only time I have ever gotten to know a guy first before developing feelings for him.
"Jake" is everything I could want in a guy. He is incredibly loyal, genuine, trustworthy, understanding, considerate, and affectionate. This is his first relationship and he's still figuring out how to be a good b/f. We have very similar backgrounds and beliefs. I know this relationship can go somewhere far. We have amazingly open communication compared to other relationships.
However, it is becoming serious really quickly. We have been dating for over 3 months, 2 of those have been spent long distance with little communication because of his location. While we have been apart, I have been receiving a lot of unwanted attention from males because I am attractive and a swing dancer. I love to dance and did not go looking for other romantic involvements. I have dealt with all but one of these advancements.
One of these guys "Matt" is incredibly attractive and shares similar beliefs. He is a really genuine, caring person which contrasts the other shallow crushes of my past. And he has feelings for me. But I am in a relationship!
I will go back to school for one more year so I will be with Jake during that time. There is no way things could ever work out with Matt because of the distance unless I go to grad school near him. How can I even be entertaining these thoughts?
I know I am getting afraid of commitment with Jake even though I do really like him and I know this relationship is substantial. He is so trusting of me though, should I share my feelings towards Matt at the risk of hurting Jake?
I am nowhere ready to be married. I will be in grad school for 6 years after graduation. Jake will still have one more year at school. I am just not sure if I am ready to settle down for good without really playing the field. But I know if I were to go back into the field, I'd only want to be in a relationship again.
It's really nice to have the stability, but I feel so guilty about my attraction toward Matt.
Is it possible to maintain a friendship with Matt? I really don't know him well but I am intrigued by his personality. He represents all of those shallow past crushes that were unobtained.
I have a tendency to be flighty, and I want to make things work out with Jake because it is so good for both of us, but to be serious at 20 without thinking of marriage until at least 4 more years?
It scares me but I don't want to run away from a good thing only to regret it later.
This is so selfish of me. I can't get Matt out of my mind but I don't want to lead him on and hurt him also...
Perplexed
Let me start out by saying that twenty is way to young to settle down and make a decision about marriage but it is not too young to have a serious boyfriend.
Actually, many intelligent and educated young women such as yourself have several "serious" boyfriends before they actually decided to get married. I think it is progress on your part that you actually have met someone like Jake who has intrigued you sufficiently to want to settle down at least temporarily.
On the other hand, your attraction to "Matt" should also tell you that you are not in the least ready for a permanent commitment.
One of the things that I found interesting was your description of your fifty short term "crushes". I think that is not unusual but it leads me to wonder how you feel about long term relationships in general. We usually grow up forming these kinds of decisions on the way our parents' relationship was handled.
Ask yourself the following questions:
1) Do I come from an intact family?
2) How did my father and mother interact with each other?
3) Did I perceive my parents marriage as happy, or did they basically seem like being together was kind of a drag?
You seem to be very fearful of any kind of personal commitment and describe yourself as flighty. I wonder if you feel that if someone got to know you better, maybe they would find you wanting.
Basically, in examining why people are so scared of getting closer, we have to look at basic self-esteem, early childhood issues, maturity, and overall readiness to decide on a life partner.
Since I know nothing of your early childhood, based on what you have told me, I assume that while you may be getting ready to actually have a real boyfriend, you wonder how you could be so attracted to someone else.
Actually, this is quite common but in your situation, I think that something about "settling down" just terrifies you.
Since you are going to be in school next year with Jake, it is a perfect time to settle into having a steady boyfriend and to enjoy the security that this brings without necessarily deciding on marriage. At twenty, that is a scary thought. You can just enjoy the good feelings and tell yourself that you are far from ready to even think about marriage. And that is absolutely true.
Just because you like or even love one guy, this doesn't stop us from feeling attracted to other guys, especially cute flirtatious ones like Matt.
I think that, really, you just love the attention and you think that by only being with one guy, you will have to give this up. This is also not true. Attention from the opposite sex is always fun, and just because we make a commitment doesn't mean we have to stop interacting with everyone else.
Above all, stop worrying about this. Enjoy the male attention you get. That's really fun. When you start the semester with Jake, just see how it goes and don't worry about marriage and the future. That freaks everybody out.
You will know what to do when you a truly ready emotionally. Right now, you aren't but that doesn't mean you can't enjoy the present. That's where all the fun is anyway.
Thanks for your letter and keep me posted.
Quote 3
we may Love d wrong person ncry 4 d wrng reason
but no matter how thngs go wrong one thng is sure,
mistakes...
help us find, d ryt prson 4 gud rison!
but no matter how thngs go wrong one thng is sure,
mistakes...
help us find, d ryt prson 4 gud rison!
Quote 2
giving my full presence to someone
wud be d switest thng i will do..
but, der wud be a question behind dat..
AM I APPRECIATED?"
wud be d switest thng i will do..
but, der wud be a question behind dat..
AM I APPRECIATED?"
Quote 1
I've got the key to his heart and I pass it on to other girls, so that they can try to open the door...he won't let me try. But each time, they get hurt by his blunt and crude love and leave him. The wall around his heart grows.
Thanks For my First Follower
Dear NailyAnis
Hello thanks for following my blog i hope we can help each other im your friend
from now on its my begining to spread helping love problems
if you have a friend in need of advice just let him/her come to me thanks for your supporting
Loving Doctor
Dr.Love
Hello thanks for following my blog i hope we can help each other im your friend
from now on its my begining to spread helping love problems
if you have a friend in need of advice just let him/her come to me thanks for your supporting
Loving Doctor
Dr.Love
Monday, January 12, 2009
Dear Dr. Love,
I have a problem about my girlfriend, she keep on asking me why do birds suddenly appear? and how much is that doggy in the window? what should I do?
From Bruno
I have a problem about my girlfriend, she keep on asking me why do birds suddenly appear? and how much is that doggy in the window? what should I do?
From Bruno
Bruno, its easy as 1, 2, 3. all you have to do is to make your girlfriend comfortable make sure to show her how much you love her. Try to make buy her a compas.
Confusing
Dear Dr. Love
Before everything just call me in the name of gina
im a 16 year old high school student... i have a problem in my love life
because its confusing
because i love 2 boys my past and my present what should i do?
whom should i choose?
my past or my present one?
im confusing and i need to choose between them i know the one who i did not choose
will have so much pain please doctor love help me
i will appreciate it thanks
Lover
Gina
Well Gina let me see... yah that wasnt easy i understand your problem and i experience that before
but i choose the most i love its my present
my advice is you should pick your present because past is past
well if you love most the past get back to him...
loving someone is soooo hard..
and dont worry about the person who will get hurt
its a part of love
Before everything just call me in the name of gina
im a 16 year old high school student... i have a problem in my love life
because its confusing
because i love 2 boys my past and my present what should i do?
whom should i choose?
my past or my present one?
im confusing and i need to choose between them i know the one who i did not choose
will have so much pain please doctor love help me
i will appreciate it thanks
Lover
Gina
Well Gina let me see... yah that wasnt easy i understand your problem and i experience that before
but i choose the most i love its my present
my advice is you should pick your present because past is past
well if you love most the past get back to him...
loving someone is soooo hard..
and dont worry about the person who will get hurt
its a part of love
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Welcome To My Site
Welcome To My site Send me stories of your life, love problems and trust me to
give you some advice
comments...
let me solve your problem...
Whether you're lonely and looking for love, always drawn to wrong partners, struggling to save a troubled relationship, scared to reenter the dating scene or wishing to reconnect with someone who has died, I am here to help you turn your life around.
Dr.Love
give you some advice
comments...
let me solve your problem...
Whether you're lonely and looking for love, always drawn to wrong partners, struggling to save a troubled relationship, scared to reenter the dating scene or wishing to reconnect with someone who has died, I am here to help you turn your life around.
At my Center for Emotional Communication, I have spent decades devising effective strategies for helping people overcome the blocks that prevent them from fully loving themselves and others.
Until now, my work has focused on improving relationships with the living.
see the submit a Love Problem story at the right corner of this website to
submit a letter from me
Dr.Love
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Abs Cbn Upcoming TV series For 2009
COMPLETE AND EXCLUSIVE!!!
==========
+ Tayong Dalawa
Kim Chiu
Gerald Anderson
Jake Cuenca
Alessandra De Rossi
Gina Pareño
Helen Gamboa
Cherry Pie Picache
Mylene Dizon
Agot Isidro
Anita Linda
Spanky Manikan
Coco Martin
Jiro Manio
Baron Geisler
Miguel Faustmann
==========
+ Humingi Ako Sa Langit
Judy Ann Santos
Derek Ramsay
Rio Locsin
William Martinez
Cherry Pie Picache
Angel Aquino
Michael de Mesa
Melanie Marquez
Al Tantay
Bangs Garcia
Candy Pangilinan
Mickey Ferriols
Brent Javier
Marc Abaya
Will Devaughn
Maxine Eigenmann
Ina Feleo
Ruben Gonzaga
Dominique Roque
Jessy Mendiola
Giovannie Pico
Benjie Paras
==========
+ Utoy (Philippines TV series)
Dolphy
Makisig Morales
Liza Lorena
Gloria Diaz
Ethel Booba
Tanya Garcia
Kathryn Bernardo
Izza Ignacio
Sheryn Regis
==========
+ Buhay Ng Buhay Ko*
Angel Locsin
Sam Milby
Diether Ocampo
==========
+ Ikaw Lamang*
Kristine Hermosa
Jericho Rosales
Carmen Soo
==========
+ The Wedding*
Anne Curtis
Zanjoe Marudo
Derek Ramsay
==========
+ The Susan Roces Cinema Collection: Florinda
Maricel Soriano
Roxanne Guinoo
Jay Manalo
Zanjoe Marudo
Cherry Pie Picache
William Martinez
Anita Linda
Nikki Gil
Bruce Quebral
Shirley Fuentes
Pooh Garcia
Aaron Junatas
==========
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Flash Bomba*
Luis Manzano
==========
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Sanlakas*
Jon Avila
Mariel Rodriguez
John Prats
Shaina Magdayao
Luis Manzano
Vhong Navarro
==========
+ Takipsilim (Twilight Philippine TV series)*
Shaina Magdayao
Rayver Cruz
Luis Manzano
Carlos Agassi
Gabby Concepcion
==========
+ Lovers in Paris (Philippine TV series)*
KC Concepcion
Piolo Pascual
Diether Ocampo/Richard Gutierrez**
Karylle
Alex Gonzaga
==========
+ Maria Mercedes (Philippine TV series)*
Angel Locsin
Piolo Pascual
Hilda Koronel
Ruffa Gutierrez
==========
+ Rubi (Philippine TV series)*
Angelica Panganiban
Diether Ocampo
==========
+ Pare Koy
John Prats
Zanjoe Marudo
Jason Gainza
Angelu de Leon
Maria Isabel Lopez
Tetchie Agbayani
Roy Alvarez
Denis Padilla
Christian Mercado
Ronald Jaimeer Humarang
Kristofer Dangculos
Ysrael Carreon
Bobby Andrews
Charee Pineda
Michelle Carbonell
Mikylla Ramirez
Igi Boy Flores
Jacq Yu as Britney
Raymund Concepcion
Olive Cortez of 26k girls
Dino Imperial
Empress Schuck
Bodie Cruz
Ruben Gonzaga
K Brosas
Gladys Guevarra
==========
+ Pinoy Bingo Night
Kris Aquino
==========
+ Maruja*
Kristine Hermosa
Karylle
Jericho Rosales
==========
+ Moon River
Maja Salvador
Geoff Eigenmann
Jodi Sta. Maria
Rafael Rossel
Mike Tan
Ella Cruz
Chin Chin Gutierrez
Tonton Gutierrez
Precious Quigaman
Kim Frances Elumba
Rina Labelle Romero
==========
+ Nagai-Aida
Maricel Soriano
Cesar Montano
Dimples Romana/Jolina Magdangal**
Ai-Ai Delas Alas
Kim Chiu
Gerald Anderson
Megan Young
Mike Tan
Paula Peralejo
Sunshine Cruz
Bea Saw
Helga Krapf
JB Magsaysay
Serena Dalrymple
==========
+ Bandidas*
Niña Jose
==========
+ Super Inggo Book 2
Makisig Morales
Joshua Dionisio
Andrew Muhlach
Sam Concepcion as Boy Bawang
Herbert Bautista
Zanjoe Marudo
Meryll Soriano
Empress Schuck
Derek Ramsay
Empoy Marquez
Geoff Taylor
Visam Arenas
Kristoff Abrenica
Rico Barrera
Matt Evans
Jairus Aquino
Kathryn Bernardo
Angelu De Leon
Alwyn Uytingco
Jao Mapa/Mark Anthony Fernandez**
Kaye Abad
Nova Villa
Chris Martinez
Matutina
==========
+ Meteor Garden (Philippine TV series)*
Sarah Geronimo
Enchong Dee
Japoy Lizaro
David Chua
Regine Angeles
Carlo Guevarra
Nova Villa
Cherie Gil
==========
+ Altagracia (Philippine TV series)*
KC Concepcion
John Lloyd Cruz
Vincent Bueno
Donita Rose
==========
+ Nardong Putik*
Jake Cuenca
==========
+ Kasal, Kasali, Kasalo (TV sitcom)
Judy Ann Santos
Ryan Agoncillo
Gina Pareño
Gloria Diaz
Ariel Ureta
Derek Ramsay
Juliana Palermo
Soliman Cruz
Lui Villaruz
Kat Alano
Tuesday Vargas
Cheena
AJ Perez
Nina Medina
Gerard Pizzaras
Cacai Bautista
==========
+ Pinoy Big Brother Season 3
Toni Gonzaga
Mariel Rodriguez
Bianca Gonzales
Luis Manzano
==========
+ Pinoy Dream Academy Season 3
Toni Gonzaga
Nikki Gil
Billy Crawford
Lead star/s, co-stars, supporting casts and its show title are original list and confirmed from ABS-CBN for the upcoming tv shows to be aired on 2009 up to 2010. As of January 2009.
* additional co-stars will be added until it completes the role.
** original cast, if accept the role. otherwise, it replaced by other star.
-------------
ABS-CBN Upcoming Shows for 2009:
+ Tayong Dalawa - JAN. 2009
+ Humingi Ako Sa Langit - JAN. 2009
+ Utoy (Philippines TV series) - FEB. 2009
+ Buhay Ng Buhay Ko - FEB. 2009
+ Ikaw Lamang - FEB. 2009
+ The Wedding - JUNE 2009
+ The Susan Roces Cinema Collection: Florinda - APRIL 2009
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Flash Bomba - FEB. 2009
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Sanlakas - APRIL 2009
+ Takipsilim (Twilight Philippine TV series) - JULY 2009
+ Lovers in Paris (Philippine TV series) - MARCH 2009
+ Maria Mercedes (Philippine TV series) - JULY 2009
+ Rubi (Philippine TV series) - SEPT. 2009
+ Pare Koy - JAN. 2009
+ Pinoy Bingo Night - JUNE 2009
+ Maruja - JULY 2009
+ Moon River - SEPT. 2009
+ Nagai-Aida - SEPT. 2009
+ Bandidas - OCT. 2009
+ Super Inggo Book 2 - AUG. 2009
+ Meteor Garden (Philippine TV series) - OCT. 2009
+ Altagracia (Philippine TV series) - SEPT. 2009
+ Nardong Putik - JUNE 2009
+ Kasal, Kasali, Kasalo (TV sitcom) - JUNE 2009
+ Pinoy Big Brother Season 3 - FEB. 2009
+ Pinoy Dream Academy Season 3 - JUNE 2009
+ Pinoy Big Brother Celebrity Edition 3 - OCT.. 2009
+ The Amazing Race Philippines - OCT. 2009
+ PBB Teen Edition Season 3 - JAN. 2010
+ Wheel of Fortune - OCT. 2009
+ Pinoy Identity - SEPT. 2009
+ Pinoy Got Talents - AUG. 2009
==========
+ Tayong Dalawa
Kim Chiu
Gerald Anderson
Jake Cuenca
Alessandra De Rossi
Gina Pareño
Helen Gamboa
Cherry Pie Picache
Mylene Dizon
Agot Isidro
Anita Linda
Spanky Manikan
Coco Martin
Jiro Manio
Baron Geisler
Miguel Faustmann
==========
+ Humingi Ako Sa Langit
Judy Ann Santos
Derek Ramsay
Rio Locsin
William Martinez
Cherry Pie Picache
Angel Aquino
Michael de Mesa
Melanie Marquez
Al Tantay
Bangs Garcia
Candy Pangilinan
Mickey Ferriols
Brent Javier
Marc Abaya
Will Devaughn
Maxine Eigenmann
Ina Feleo
Ruben Gonzaga
Dominique Roque
Jessy Mendiola
Giovannie Pico
Benjie Paras
==========
+ Utoy (Philippines TV series)
Dolphy
Makisig Morales
Liza Lorena
Gloria Diaz
Ethel Booba
Tanya Garcia
Kathryn Bernardo
Izza Ignacio
Sheryn Regis
==========
+ Buhay Ng Buhay Ko*
Angel Locsin
Sam Milby
Diether Ocampo
==========
+ Ikaw Lamang*
Kristine Hermosa
Jericho Rosales
Carmen Soo
==========
+ The Wedding*
Anne Curtis
Zanjoe Marudo
Derek Ramsay
==========
+ The Susan Roces Cinema Collection: Florinda
Maricel Soriano
Roxanne Guinoo
Jay Manalo
Zanjoe Marudo
Cherry Pie Picache
William Martinez
Anita Linda
Nikki Gil
Bruce Quebral
Shirley Fuentes
Pooh Garcia
Aaron Junatas
==========
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Flash Bomba*
Luis Manzano
==========
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Sanlakas*
Jon Avila
Mariel Rodriguez
John Prats
Shaina Magdayao
Luis Manzano
Vhong Navarro
==========
+ Takipsilim (Twilight Philippine TV series)*
Shaina Magdayao
Rayver Cruz
Luis Manzano
Carlos Agassi
Gabby Concepcion
==========
+ Lovers in Paris (Philippine TV series)*
KC Concepcion
Piolo Pascual
Diether Ocampo/Richard Gutierrez**
Karylle
Alex Gonzaga
==========
+ Maria Mercedes (Philippine TV series)*
Angel Locsin
Piolo Pascual
Hilda Koronel
Ruffa Gutierrez
==========
+ Rubi (Philippine TV series)*
Angelica Panganiban
Diether Ocampo
==========
+ Pare Koy
John Prats
Zanjoe Marudo
Jason Gainza
Angelu de Leon
Maria Isabel Lopez
Tetchie Agbayani
Roy Alvarez
Denis Padilla
Christian Mercado
Ronald Jaimeer Humarang
Kristofer Dangculos
Ysrael Carreon
Bobby Andrews
Charee Pineda
Michelle Carbonell
Mikylla Ramirez
Igi Boy Flores
Jacq Yu as Britney
Raymund Concepcion
Olive Cortez of 26k girls
Dino Imperial
Empress Schuck
Bodie Cruz
Ruben Gonzaga
K Brosas
Gladys Guevarra
==========
+ Pinoy Bingo Night
Kris Aquino
==========
+ Maruja*
Kristine Hermosa
Karylle
Jericho Rosales
==========
+ Moon River
Maja Salvador
Geoff Eigenmann
Jodi Sta. Maria
Rafael Rossel
Mike Tan
Ella Cruz
Chin Chin Gutierrez
Tonton Gutierrez
Precious Quigaman
Kim Frances Elumba
Rina Labelle Romero
==========
+ Nagai-Aida
Maricel Soriano
Cesar Montano
Dimples Romana/Jolina Magdangal**
Ai-Ai Delas Alas
Kim Chiu
Gerald Anderson
Megan Young
Mike Tan
Paula Peralejo
Sunshine Cruz
Bea Saw
Helga Krapf
JB Magsaysay
Serena Dalrymple
==========
+ Bandidas*
Niña Jose
==========
+ Super Inggo Book 2
Makisig Morales
Joshua Dionisio
Andrew Muhlach
Sam Concepcion as Boy Bawang
Herbert Bautista
Zanjoe Marudo
Meryll Soriano
Empress Schuck
Derek Ramsay
Empoy Marquez
Geoff Taylor
Visam Arenas
Kristoff Abrenica
Rico Barrera
Matt Evans
Jairus Aquino
Kathryn Bernardo
Angelu De Leon
Alwyn Uytingco
Jao Mapa/Mark Anthony Fernandez**
Kaye Abad
Nova Villa
Chris Martinez
Matutina
==========
+ Meteor Garden (Philippine TV series)*
Sarah Geronimo
Enchong Dee
Japoy Lizaro
David Chua
Regine Angeles
Carlo Guevarra
Nova Villa
Cherie Gil
==========
+ Altagracia (Philippine TV series)*
KC Concepcion
John Lloyd Cruz
Vincent Bueno
Donita Rose
==========
+ Nardong Putik*
Jake Cuenca
==========
+ Kasal, Kasali, Kasalo (TV sitcom)
Judy Ann Santos
Ryan Agoncillo
Gina Pareño
Gloria Diaz
Ariel Ureta
Derek Ramsay
Juliana Palermo
Soliman Cruz
Lui Villaruz
Kat Alano
Tuesday Vargas
Cheena
AJ Perez
Nina Medina
Gerard Pizzaras
Cacai Bautista
==========
+ Pinoy Big Brother Season 3
Toni Gonzaga
Mariel Rodriguez
Bianca Gonzales
Luis Manzano
==========
+ Pinoy Dream Academy Season 3
Toni Gonzaga
Nikki Gil
Billy Crawford
Lead star/s, co-stars, supporting casts and its show title are original list and confirmed from ABS-CBN for the upcoming tv shows to be aired on 2009 up to 2010. As of January 2009.
* additional co-stars will be added until it completes the role.
** original cast, if accept the role. otherwise, it replaced by other star.
-------------
ABS-CBN Upcoming Shows for 2009:
+ Tayong Dalawa - JAN. 2009
+ Humingi Ako Sa Langit - JAN. 2009
+ Utoy (Philippines TV series) - FEB. 2009
+ Buhay Ng Buhay Ko - FEB. 2009
+ Ikaw Lamang - FEB. 2009
+ The Wedding - JUNE 2009
+ The Susan Roces Cinema Collection: Florinda - APRIL 2009
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Flash Bomba - FEB. 2009
+ Komiks Presents: Mars Ravelo's Sanlakas - APRIL 2009
+ Takipsilim (Twilight Philippine TV series) - JULY 2009
+ Lovers in Paris (Philippine TV series) - MARCH 2009
+ Maria Mercedes (Philippine TV series) - JULY 2009
+ Rubi (Philippine TV series) - SEPT. 2009
+ Pare Koy - JAN. 2009
+ Pinoy Bingo Night - JUNE 2009
+ Maruja - JULY 2009
+ Moon River - SEPT. 2009
+ Nagai-Aida - SEPT. 2009
+ Bandidas - OCT. 2009
+ Super Inggo Book 2 - AUG. 2009
+ Meteor Garden (Philippine TV series) - OCT. 2009
+ Altagracia (Philippine TV series) - SEPT. 2009
+ Nardong Putik - JUNE 2009
+ Kasal, Kasali, Kasalo (TV sitcom) - JUNE 2009
+ Pinoy Big Brother Season 3 - FEB. 2009
+ Pinoy Dream Academy Season 3 - JUNE 2009
+ Pinoy Big Brother Celebrity Edition 3 - OCT.. 2009
+ The Amazing Race Philippines - OCT. 2009
+ PBB Teen Edition Season 3 - JAN. 2010
+ Wheel of Fortune - OCT. 2009
+ Pinoy Identity - SEPT. 2009
+ Pinoy Got Talents - AUG. 2009
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